What if...

What if...

...I allowed God to lead me in all my decisions? What would each day look like? How would I feel physically, emotionally, spiritually? Would that change the way my children behave? How would my husband respond to a wife that is living in the center of God's will?

I am starting to figure that out and hope to share stories that evidence God's lead in my life.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Bring Your Love to Life

I was listening to the radio today and mindlessly singing a song that I have heard a dozen times before. However, today the lyrics of the song came alive and I began to cry as I listened to the words. The song was "Love Come to Life" by Big Daddy Weave.

Listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOVF634y6-Y

The part the really caught my attention was "Break my heart 'til it moves my hands and feet, for the hopeless, for the broken. The ones who don't know you love them."

In Evansville I volunteered weekly at the Evansville Christian Life Center in the kitchen and food pantry. I worked on Fridays, but they serve meals every Tuesday-Friday and the food pantry was open on the same schedule. It was the most incredible experience to serve people who needed a hot meal and a warm/cool place to sit down for 30 minutes. To pray with people who had nothing but the clothes on their backs. To work along side people who had a genuine heart to serve the lost and hopeless. To help restore hope through the love and mercy of Jesus Christ.

I remember my first Friday in June 2009. We spent the morning preparing food and cooking the meal. At 11:00 we stopped to pray before we began to serve the meal. The people line up in the hallway where there is no air conditioning and wait for us to open the dining room door. The cold air hits them as the door opens, but it heats up quickly in there once it is full of people. As they enter, each person picks up a drink - tea, kool-aid, or water usually - and finds a seat. Most days they could also grab a dessert from the dessert cart before sitting down. We carry plates out to each person and serve them as though it is a restaurant. Each person can have as many plates as he or she can eat, but the posted sign asked that people only stay about 30 minutes to make room for new arrivals.

As I walked into the dining room with a smile and my first two plates it was all I could do to keep from crying. I saw a woman with her two preschool age daughters. I saw elderly men and women. I saw young families. I saw white people, black people, hispanic people. I could smell body odor and filth. I also saw grateful smiles and heard laughter between friends. I heard please and thank you as I passed a new plate or cleared away dirty ones. It was a safe place where for a few minutes a person who is broken and beaten down by life could take refuge and not feel judged.

The greatest thing about being there every Friday was building relationships with people whom I would have otherwise never met. I gained a greater appreciation for what I have and how quickly material things can be taken away - through bad choice or things outside a persons control. Each time I had the opportunity to pray with a "customer" in the food pantry I always prayed that they would experience unspeakable joy that only comes from God inspite of their circumstances.

In a sermon I heard many years ago, the pastor gave the book of Philippians the subtitle "The Joy of the Lord is my Strength." That is my heart's desire for every moment, every situation, every encounter.

Paul wrote his letter to the Philippians while he was in prison. His perspective can only be explained by his relationship with his Savior.

Philippians 4:10-13 "I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. 11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength."

I hope one day soon I will find a place to serve here in Fayetteville just like the ECLC (as we called it) in Evansville.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

No Soliciting

In August 2009 our chruch in Evansville celebrated it's 35th anniversary by having a church wide weekend of service. Everyone who went out to serve received a t-shirt that said "The Church has left the Building" and the verse from Galatians 5:6 "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." Our family participated in a clean up project at an elderly woman's home in downtown Evansville. We also baked dozens of cookies and distributed them throughout our neighborhood and on campus with a simple note that said "Just because God loves you." and John 3:16 printed at the bottom. It was absolutely amazing how touched people were to receive a bag of cookies for free and a friendly smile from our family.

The kids and I decided to do this again for our new neighborhood here in Fayetteville. We didn't baked so many cookies, but thought it would be a nice way to get to meet our neighbors. We rang doorbells at about 20 houses, but only gave away 10 bags of cookies today. Some people were not home while others, it seemed, may have avoided answering the door. Several doors had a homemade sign taped to the glass that simply read "No Soliciting". I explained to the kids that meant if we were selling something, the people who lived there were letting us know they were not interested in talking to us. I told them we were just stopping to say hello so it was ok to ring the doorbell.

It was so interesting to watch people's response to us - especially once they understood that we were not trying to sell them anything. We really did surprise them. Most opened their door slowly and cautiously prepared to say no, thank you, I don't want any. After we introduced ourselves and began to talk, their tight grip on the doorknob loosened and they relaxed to allow the door to open beyond a crack. We had some wonderful conversations.

One of the last houses we attempted to visit had a most disturbing note posted in the window. It read something like this. We ONLY buy Girl Scout cookies. DO NOT ring the doorbell or knock if you are selling anything else, if you are the FedEx man, or if you are a personal friend. We have everything we need. I was so sad and disturbed by this. I wondered why people would try to isolated themselves like this. And what if they do not know who Jesus is? Will their sign turn away the Good News as well? We rang the doorbell just in case, but no one answered the door.

What makes people become so afraid to open their front door? Why do we hideout from the rest of the world? Psalm 139 speaks to the intimate way God knows each of us.
1 You have searched me, LORD,
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you, LORD, know it completely.
5 You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

We read Jesus' prayer for his disciples in John 17:6-19. The first time I read these verses and grasped the intesity of his prayer I cried. The profound relationship he had with his disciples was unmistakable in the way he prayed for them. Then in verses 20-26 he prays for all believers - that means me! Jesus wants to be in relationship with me and he prayed for me and all the believers "that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22 I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one— 23 I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me."

I hope that our little note and bag of cookies with open the door for us to share the love and relationship of Jesus Christ with the people around us. I know we can pray for our neighbors - the ones we met today and the people behind the unopened door. May God give me the courage to ring more doorbells and express his love.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Preparing the Soil

I really enjoy sports movies. I love the lessons we can teach and learn through sports - hard work, perseverance, teamwork, sportsmanship, compassion, leadership, and most of all glorifying God with the talents he has given us. One of my favorite sports movies is "Facing the Giants".  A teacher, Mr. Bridges, feels lead to stop by the football coach's office to encourage him that God is not finished with him in his role as football coach. When the coach, who is struggling to keep his job, confesses that he doesn't see God at work Mr. Bridges shares this story.

Two farmers desperately needed rain and they both prayed and asked God to send rain. One sat and waited while the other went out and prepared his fields to receive the rain. Which farmer trusted God to send rain? Which one are you? God will send the rain when he is ready. You need to prepare your field to receive it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQRGvLKObmM

I often find myself in seasons of waiting. Before I got pregnant with our first child. Before job changes. Moving to a new place where I know no one. God puts me in these seasons because, I think, I struggle with patience and waiting on his timing. I sense a waiting now as I consider all that God will do through me and our family here in NW Arkansas. I get excited at the possibilities as I meet new people and experience new things. I know he has something wonderful in store. This movie reminds me that I must continue to prepare through the uncomfortable waiting. I must continue to pray and seek God's wisdom through His Word.

2 Peter 3:8-9 says "But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. 9 The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."

Peter is encouraging the believers about the second coming of Christ because so many are mocking them for their belief in God. I must remember this each day. God's plan is not confined by time as I understand it so I must continue to prepare myself until Jesus' return so that I can be about His business. If that is "just" staying home and taking care of my family right now, then so be it. If that is getting involved in college minstry, writing a book, or helping to feed the homeless, I must prepare the soil of my heart so I can hear God speak when he is ready. Then I, as Paul prayed in Ephesians 3:18-19, "may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that [I] may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Your Grace is Enough

I spent last weekend in Columbia, SC for my 10 year student-athlete reunion. It was so great to be back on campus. The adrenaline rushed as though I was the one about to compete as I listened to "2001 Odessey" in Williams-Brice Stadium with 75,000 cheering fans. Now that we live far away it will be even harder to visit and cheer for our Gamecocks in person. Going back always brings lots of memories flooding back to my mind. So many of them are terrific - friends, classes, hard workouts, successful track meets, and of course the beginning of Tyrone's and my relationship. Unfortunately other memories come back too. Memories that I am not so fond of and would rather forget. Mistakes that were made that I often wish I could fix and take back. Choices that have had a consequencial impact on my life.

I used to beat myself up over those bad choices. Negative thoughts about myself that would consume me to the point of tears. I would dwell on those things and allow them to define my self worth and character today. Praise the Lord! those thoughts are not from God. He has forgiven me of my sins by his grace and mercy. Lamentations 3:22-23 assures me, "2It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness."

I am thankful everyday that inspite of my choices - the ugly, embarrassing ones or the prideful ones or even the best ones - God has given me the free gift of salvation through the perfect life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. When satan tries to torment me with my "baggage" or my flesh takes over I can take refuge in the arms of my Savior that he has given me the power to overcome and continue to live for His purpose and His glory.

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 "The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish stronghlds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive evey thought to make it obedient to Christ."

God has used the worst of my choices to mold me and stretch me. He uses them in the lives of people I meet so they can experience freedom for their baggage too. He uses them in my parenting so I can better relate to my children and steer them away for the world's temptation as they grow up. I certainly wish I would have made some better choices along the way, but I know first hand Paul's struggle in 2 Corinthians 12 and I claim Jesus' words in verse 9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

Thank you, God, that your grace is enough. Chris Tomlin sings it well.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtnE_e1LylY

Monday, November 14, 2011

He's an On Time God

I do believe God's timing is perfect. I just have a hard time acknowledging it sometimes when I don't get my way. I was reminded tonight that God does work through the giant traumatic events all the way down to the tiniest of details that we don't even notice to fullfill His plan and His purpose for our lives. I have seen Him do it in my life over and over in my marriage, my children, my work, Tyrone's work, etc. Often he is practical. In hindsight it usually looks ridiculously obvious and I feel silly for being so impatient. I have to confess my lack of faith. Praise the Lord for His faithfulness is steadfast and "His word is truth." John 17:17

At church tonight the featured speaker asked if we each know the vision God has for our lives. I did not raise my hand with an affirmative response. I have some ideas. I described it as being on the tip of my tongue. I feel it. I will know it when I see it. I am praying for it, but I can't put it into words yet. I need to keep praying - HARD. I need to dig into God's Word because I know he is speaking. I need to make sure I am listening intently. I must invest myself in this relationship I have with my Savior and my God.

I must be patient. I know right now God has called me to invest my time and energy into being a homemaker, a wife, a mother, a friend. He has given me some wonderful new relationships and continues to renew bonds with old friends. I know He is laying a foundation fo the vision He has for my life. I am excited and I get anxious all too often. Tonight we looked at Habakkuk 2:3 "For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay."

I have included a link to the Dottie Peoples song, "He's an on time God". God brought it to mind as I drove home tonight. He never fails. He always gives me a song. Part of the chorus says, "He may not come when you want him, but he'll be there right on time." How true.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRgvYgOJK6g

Not only is God's timing perfect, but to quote our speaker, Amy, from earlier tonight "God's timing is always worth the wait."

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Cleaning the Bathrooms

In order to help me stay on top of my housekeeping - since I dislike it so much - I created a weekly cleaning schedule when we moved to Fayetteville. I had done it once before when I was pregnant with Maiesha. It works very well for me, but it doesn't make cleaning any more fun. I especially loathe cleaning bathrooms on Tuesdays.

While I was cleaning the bathrooms yesterday - even more challenging now that we have 2.5 of them - I was reminded of obedience. I found the following definition on dictionary.com, "the act or practice of obeying; dutiful or submissive compliance". As part of my role as homemaker, it is my responsibility to keep our house clean. It is part of what makes our house a home. It protects us from diseases. It teaches our children good hygeine and makes it safe for Lydia to crawl on the floor. It is part of being good stewards of what God has given us.

So I am reminded of Colossians 3:23-24 "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, 24 since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."

And Jesus serves as the ultimate example of obedience and humility. As Paul describes in Philippians 2:5-10 "Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus; Who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death - even death on a cross! Therefore God exalted him to the highest place..."

Washing dishes, folding laundry, running the taxi service, or cooking dinner is an act of obedience to the "job" God has called me to. With that mindset, I can have joy even when I am cleaning the toilets.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Where is Your Treasure?

It has been a very eventful 12 days since we closed on our house October 26. It seems like it was so long ago already. The walls are painted, the new hardwood floor is almost done, the new carpet smell in great in the bedrooms. We managed to get the "old" place cleaned out on halloween morning and last night was our first night alone in our new house. My parents arrived last Sunday to visit and help us get settled in. We said good-bye to them yesterday morning. We would still be staring at a ton of boxes and projects if they had not made the day and a half journey from northwest Ohio. It feels so wonderful to have our own home again.

While I was driving home one day last week a song came on the radio about how this earth is not our home and it really reminded me to keep an eternal perspective about this new house we have. God has blessed us tremendously with this house and all the upgrades we have done. It would be so easy to leave it at that and go on living life. However, I am claiming the verses in Matthew 6:19-21 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

My treasure is the shed blood of Jesus Christ for my sins. The salvation he freely offers because he gave his sinless life as randsome for me. The fact that He defeated death and rose from the grave on the 3rd day. My treasure is knowing because he chose me I can live in heaven with HIM for all of eternity. So this house and all our stuff are just tools I can use to glorify Him. This house is an opportunity to minister to anyone who walks through the door. It is a means for me to invite people in to our lives in order to share the Good News with all who need a Savior.

With all the fun and excitement of having a new house, I must give it all back to God each day so he can use me, my family, this roof over our heads for His purpose and to His glory for as many days as he has ordained for us to live here. One day this will all pass away. I will stand before God and give an account of how I used the tools He gave me - how I responded to the oppurtunities He placed in from of me. I want to be able to say I used it to further Your Kingdom and share the grace and mercy that was given to me. I want to hear, "Well done good and faithful servant." (Matthew 25:23 - Parable of the Talents)