I
sat in a room at a table across from a wise, older woman about 5 years ago.
Jeremiah and Maiesha, ages 3 and 18 months, played at the back of the room
while we talked. It was a pivotal conversation in the way I saw my life’s
purpose.
This
woman, Pat, was the Women’s Ministry Director at our church in Evansville, IN.
She heard me speak at our bi-weekly Mom 2 Mom meeting on the topic of
submission a few weeks earlier. We had lived in Evansville for about a year. I
jumped into the women’s ministry activities quickly because I was staying home
with our kids full-time and I needed adult conversation and interaction. I
asked Pat if we could meet so I could share my enthusiasm for what God was
doing at that time and to get some direction from someone who had more
knowledge and experience than me.
Our
meeting lasted nearly 2 hours. I took one brief break to take Jeremiah potty.
The thing I walked away with that day is what drives me today. It is also what
frustrates me more than almost anything else. Pat looked at me and said Lynette,
I sense that God has something BIG in store for you. I don’t know when or
where, but I believe it is something BIG. We talked about taking care of my
family and continuing to seek God’s direction while the BIG thing unfolds in
God’s timing.
Wow!
Me? Really? Cool! What is it? Come on – just tell me. Please God, I don’t want
to wait. I am ready for it now. These are the thoughts that flooded my mind as
Pat spoke those powerful words. They have continued to run through my mind
daily ever since that conversation 5 years ago. Many days my motivation is out
of a need to be significant and feel important. On my best days these thoughts
come from a genuine heart that desires to fulfill the purpose God has for me. I
often sit and brainstorm about what this BIG thing could be. I think about what
I am good at and what I most enjoy doing. It must be related to one of those
things, right?
The
trouble is if I am not careful, I get caught up in my daydreams about the BIG
thing and forget how important all the big things are in my life in this
season. If I am not careful I lose sight of what God is doing to refine in me
now. I wiggle and squirm as he chisels away at my layers of selfish ambition
and vain conceit (Philippians 2:3) rather than seeing it as part of the journey
that will lead me to this BIG thing.
I
am a mom to 4 children now. Those sweet babes from 5 years ago are 8 and nearly
7. My little ones are 2 ½ years and 2 months old. I want each of them to have a
deep, personal relationship with Jesus and develop a vision for God’s plan for
each of them here on Earth. It is my job to lead them toward that vision. Talk
about a big job.
Tyrone
and I have walked through some huge challenges in our marriage. We have been
married for 12 years by God’s grace. We easily could have given up early on. We
could have given up last year if it were not for the prayers of many and the
Holy Spirit guiding us. Talk about a big redemption.
Just
a few months ago I experienced freedom from a past that had troubled me for
more than a decade. In the sweet words of Beth Moore from study “Breaking Free”
I can say it is under my feet. Talk about a big triumph.
I
am on my way to freedom from my anger problem. I have lived on this earth for
35 years and I realized less than a year ago that I have been an angry person
for most of my life. The saddest part is that my anger is often directed at the
people I love the most. Talk about a big
transformation in our family.
I
work part time at our church which has grown by 40% each of the last 3 years. I
am responsible for the children’s ministry – birth through 5th
grade. I have the privilege of connecting with families every week and pouring
into their lives. I get to work with 30 to 40 faithful volunteers who pour into
each of the 90 plus kids who come to our classrooms every Sunday. Talk about
something bigger than me.
I
am learning to appreciate and celebrate all these big things in my life. I am becoming
a patient person and learning all the lessons God has for me. I can’t help but
think how are they all fitting together? How are they shaping me for the BIG
thing God has for me?
I
know there is something BIGGER still out there for me, but the things I am a part
of now are already bigger than what I would have chosen. God knew I would be
here where I am now and he had these things in mind for me before he formed me
in my mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13). He knows what is down the road. He knows
when my story is complete. I need to trust him with those details and focus on
the big jobs he has given me now. They are each preparing me for the next
season. They are a part of a legacy I am leaving that will hopefully carry on
through our children and grandchildren and beyond. I want to be obedient and
patient to wait on God’s perfect time for each thing he has for me no matter
how BIG or how small.
I
am confident of this, that he who began a good work in me will carry it on to
completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6).
