Thoughts on Racial Color Blindness

I wrote the following in June 2017- 3 years ago. It seems important to share it now for my white friends and family who may have questions, fears, and concerns about the current status of racial injustice in the United States. This is so much more important to me now than when I wrote it. I spend 2 1/2 years in graduate school since writing this growing my knowledge and vocabulary to be able to teach my children and have good conversations with anyone. Now I have two teenagers and most days I hesitate to let them go out into the world on their own for fear of what they may face any given day. I invite your questions and comments as long as you lead with love and compassion.

Written June 20, 2017...

What is your favorite color? Mine is most any shade of teal. I love it with white in a chevron pattern. I love in in the ocean’s waves of the Caribbean next to the tan sand. I love it next to red in my daughter’s new outfit. I have a pair of teal high heels that I love to pair with navy blue or orange. I just can’t get enough of it. I didn’t really even notice this color until a few years ago, but now I can’t image my wardrobe or life without it. What if I were color blind and unable to distinguish the infinite array of colors God created for us to enjoy. His creativity is limitless and I am so thankful that I get to experience the richness of color every day.

So how did we ever become convinced that colorblindness related to race and ethnicity was a correct path to follow? I think some people had genuine, good intentions when they (whoever they are) thought colorblindness was a good approach to “fix” racism in the United States. To attempt to look at another person and convince yourself that you do not see the color of their skin is silly. What we most often intend by the noble statement, “I teach my kids to be color blind.” is we don’t judge people’s actions by the color of their skin. Unfortunately, in a country like ours where there has always existed a dominate Caucasian culture within the power structure as well as the history of African-American enslavement and oppression our statement of colorblindness leads us to devalue and dismiss the culture and influence of a beautifully diverse group of people who like ALL people was and is created in the image of God. Just like all the shades of teal that I love so much, God deliberately created every shade of skin to demonstrate who he is and bring glory to his name through the thousands of shades of people he placed on this earth.

You may argue that you are very careful to not judge people by the color of their skin. I think I am careful too, but honestly I do it too, and I am married to a black man. I look at him and see the beauty of his skin color. I see what a gorgeous shade of brown we created in our 4 kids. I am attracted to him, in part because of the color of his skin, but when he says or does something that I don’t like or don’t understand, there are ideas that pop into my head that say “that is how black people are” or “that’s what’s wrong with black people”. Oh my goodness…how is that possible? We have been married for nearly 16 years and known each other for 20 years. How is it possible that these kinds of thoughts run through my head about my partner in life?

Let’s me explain! I have begun to learn about the concept of implicit bias. It is something that exists in us all and it very obviously applies to our discussions about race relations. “Thoughts and feelings are “implicit” if we are unaware of them or mistaken about their nature. We have a bias when, rather than being neutral, we have a preference for (or aversion to) a person or group of people. Thus, we use the term “implicit bias” to describe when we have attitudes towards people or associate stereotypes with them without our conscious knowledge. A fairly commonplace example of this is seen in studies that show that white people will frequently associate criminality with black people without even realizing they’re doing it. (https://perception.org/research/implicit-bias/)

In the book “Good Faith” by David Kinnaman and Gabe Lions they give an example of implicit bias. “Gabe is over six feet tall and pretty broad across the shoulders, but he has probably never been referred to or even thought of as a big scary white dude. But ‘big scary black dude’ just sounds normal. That’s implicit bias.”

This was the description provided in some of the media coverage surrounding the shooting of Terence Crutcher in Tulsa, OK last year. Whatever you think about the topic of police brutality and the shooting of black people, think for a moment about how implicit bias would cause a person to respond differently based on the color of another’s skin.

The “Good Faith” authors go on to explain, “The only remedy for people of good faith is for us to intentionally become aware of our unconscious biases with help of a diverse Christian community.”

“The problem for the church is that many (if not most) Christian communities in the United States are homogenous – that is, not diverse at all. And layered atop the problem of most churches’ ethnic homogeneity is the popular idea that the “good Christian” thing to do is to practice colorblindness – where we ignore differences all together. Out of a sincerely good intention to judge others “not by the color of their skin but the content of their character,” as Martin Luther King Jr. challenged, white people often make an effort to see everyone the same – at least consciously. But colorblindness does not make space for people to appreciate different social narratives and cultural expressions.” (Good Faith, Ch 12)

Our elementary school has the distinction of being a “Leader in Me” school. The principles are adapted for kids from Steven Covey’s “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”. Habit 5 is “Seek first to understand and then to be understood.” This is similar to James 1:19-20 (NLT) where James says, “Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.” Based on this habit and Biblical command, let’s approach everyone, especially those who are different from us, with a listening ear ready to understand their perspective first. I define listening for my children as a two-part process. You must first hear what the person said and then respond with as appropriate action. If I am attempting to be kind and compassionate, my appropriate action will at the very least be delivered in love. Then whether I agree or disagree I am treating he/she with respect because we are both human beings created in the image of God.

So let’s make a real effort to make margin in our lives and our schedules to welcome people in who look and live differently from ourselves. It may be a bit scary, but I promise it will only serve to enhance your life and grow your knowledge and understand of who God is. And as a follower of Jesus Christ, it is my responsibility to demonstrate God’s love to ALL tribes, nations, ethnicities and languages so his name will be made great and more people will know and worship him. And just like my new favorite color brings joy to my life, the addition of a variety of people will bring so much more.

That's so Stereotypical

On the eve of my 39^th birthday, I chose to reflect on where God has positioned me in the context of faith, race, and American culture. I am learning more and more about how God wants me to give my life away each day for the sake of something far greater than me. After a long chat with a friend on Sunday morning in the hallway at church, she texted me Monday morning to encourage me. She recognized that I am in a potentially lonely place as I stand between different groups of people and attempt to build bridges. Often times the bridges are going to span deep chasms where it has been too dangerous to ever attempt a bridge or ravines where a bridge once existed or was started but was burned by someone who didn’t want the two sides to unite. She was right…being a bridge builder is a lonely business to be in, but I believe that is exactly what God is calling me to be. So today I share some thoughts that were sparked by a brief digital exchange I had with an acquaintance recently that will serve as tools and supplies for one of the bridges I am supposed to build.

Let’s begin with a simple definition. A stereotype is a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person or thing (google search for stereotype definition). A stereotype is a preconceived notion, especially about a group of people. Many stereotypes are racist, sexist, or homophobic. (www.vocabulary.com)

A few weeks ago I shared a picture of my biracial (African-American and Caucasian) children on Facebook with a post that read,

“Racism exist in each of us…even in my house. So what do we do about it? Every time you say “white people are so ____” my children are hurt because you are talking about their mother and them. Every time you think “black people are so ____” my children are hurt because you are talking about their father and them. Every time you let hateful or ignorant ideas “be ok” you are saying racism is ok.  We are created differently to display the diversity of our Creator.”

I received lots of “likes” and “loves” and comments about the post. One person decided to send a private message to ask a very interesting question. It is for dialog like she and I had that I will continue to post thought provoking things in the hopes that we can start bridge-building conversations.

The inquiring person asked what I thought about stereotypes. She wanted to know if I thought “positive” stereotypes would be considered a form of racism acknowledging that even “positive” stereotypes are not always accurate.

So what are some “positive” stereotypes? Black people are good at basketball. All Asian people are geniuses. I can think of a few others that would be considered “harmless” or “just a joke.” White people don’t have any rhythm. Black people love fried chicken. Latinas are all great cooks.

For the record I think all stereotypes are rooted in negativity or indifference toward others. We find it easier to generalize. I think stereotypes are insensitive and can lead us down a path of thinking that's all a group of people is known for. This line of thought could totally apply outside of race, but it seems to be the most obvious there. Is there some truth to stereotypes? Of course, what’s the saying? Stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason. The problem is what we chose to do with stereotypes once we begin to spend time around different people. Do we hold on to our stereotypical expectation or invest time getting to know someone as the unique individual he or she is. As a parent with my own kids, I see them as very unique individuals even though they can from the same two parents. We work hard not to push them all into one category just because of their shared surname. We can apply the same logic when talking about race. A refusal to apply stereotypes allows us to see the beauty in how God has created people from all over the planet and the infinite creativity he possesses. I think it takes a little more effort to develop relationships with people who are different than us, but then it becomes easier to understand why no one wants to be known by a stereotype.

Allow me to share a story from my husband’s childhood to illustrate my point. Tyrone was a 3rd culture kid. He was born in the US and lived a large part of his childhood in Europe because his Dad was in the Army. They settled back in the US when he was in middle school. When he arrived on the playground at school in Mt. Pleasant, SC there was an expectation from the other kids, black and white, that he would be good at basketball because he was black. Growing up in Europe, basketball was not an option for him so he had never played. He felt embarrassed at the least that he could not do something that he was "supposed" to be able to do. He went on to be a pretty good football player in high school as well as track and wrestling. His greatest accomplishments, however, were being invited to the prestigious wind ensemble (he played trombone) as a freshman and being the first in his family to earn a Ph. D.

 If we let the stereotypes stand, where do all the people end up who are not good at the thing we think they are supposed to be good at? Or worse perhaps, we hold someone to a negative stereotype never allowing them to fulfill their full potential because it doesn’t fit the mold our stereotypes have formed for their group.

This begs the question do I refer to a person who uses stereotypes as racist?

In most cases, absolutely not! Recalling our definition, stereotypes often come from racist ideas, but to begin to label people as racist without careful evaluation will not build bridges but widen the gaps between us. It will also minimize the validity of systemic racism in our country and further distract us from the issues we need to address. I think it is important to identify ideas and processes of thought that come from false notions about race so we can become more empathetic and value one another's life experiences. Let’s fight against the intellectual laziness of stereotypes and give more effort toward loving our neighbor as ourselves. Only when we chose to value one another and our differences can we truly build bridges that will unite.